Twice and a Blue Moon

I barely had the proverbial ink dry on my post the other day about how my 2 year old was destined to end us on the news when he managed to make a jail break through the front door wearing only a diaper. To make it even better,  our neighbors across the street had juuuuuust gathered in their driveway right in time to see the show.

The husband was in the kitchen making the boys lunch.  I was taking my turn working in the garage on our latest family project.  Total and utter normal lifing when Mr. Terrible Twos walked out the front door, closed it behind himself and then proceeded to run down our front pathway towards the garage with a huge shit eating grin yelling, “I surprise, Mama!”  In case you are wondering: He nailed it!! Despite the fact that nothing should surprise me when it comes to Mr. Terrible – surprised I was. I found myself half waving politely to the neighbors while doing the run/walk thing to make it look like a “oh hi, no biggie – we’re just playing!” kind of encounter. Nothing to see here people! I’m just a totally typical parent screwing up in front of the whole neighborhood! Smiles and waves!!

I brought Mr. Terrible back into the house through the garage door, alerted the husband that we had a flight risk child and locked the front door which while normally locked at all times, I believe had been accidentally left unlocked in the hustle and bustle of going in and out of the house during our family project that day.  It only takes ONE slip up.  Add deadbolts to the “false sense of security” list.

Y’all – parenting this kid is exhausting.

But the real star of this post should not be the last few nerves I have left after the most recent additions to my toddler nightmare tales, (I’m down to 3 nerves which I have named Larry, Moe and Xanax and are the perfect combo of laughter and medication), but should be the project which gave me the chance to mess up parenting AGAIN and share publicly AGAIN (whoa – a parental admission that I’m not perfect! How retro of me!).

So without further ado, let me make this announcement in Social Media 2016 fashion! And let me stop you right here and say this is NOT (nor will it ever ever ever be) a pregnancy announcement. Oh no – But much like people, when 2 Adirondack chairs love each other very much… yadda yadda yadda… it’s twins!

And guys, I had such a better picture in my mind but alas it’s raining cats and dogs here in Southern California and it not only ruined The Talking Dead last night  but also ruined my perfectly planned chair announcement photo. Le Sigh. So here are our beautiful family chairs in our not so beautiful garage/workshop. And yes – there is my comforter in the background to hide all our shiz.  Keeping it #klassy!

While round one of the Adirondacks took place a few weeks ago it became quickly obvious (at least to me) that our minis needed their own minis. Something about your 4 year old looking at you with those big’ ol amber eyes asking, “But where is MY chair?” So my dear, sweet begrudgingly obliging husband spent his after work hours over the past week cutting and sanding the itty bitty littlest chair pieces I’ve ever seen – which is pretty easy to be since this is on the second set of chairs we have made!

Despite our current state of thunder, lightening and rain, it was blazing saddles hot on Saturday and I was able to turn those sad little pale boards into some serious majestic beauty.

With a couple sets of watchful eyes and great anticipation these chairs were stained, assembled, patched, and tweaked all between the normal living hours of Saturday and Sunday.

These two could barely handle the wait for the chairs to be completed. Mr. Terrible couldn’t even wait to put pants on. What can I say? This is a pants optional household for anyone under the age of 5.

And after scaling the fridge, making a run for it in the wild, climbing on top of the dining room table, and testing the strength of nerve Moe AND nerve Larry, he rested…Me and the hubs plan to rest in about 16 years!